getting my period back (after 4 years without it đ)
a healthy body is one that feels safe. no period = no good! let's talk tips and tricks for restoring a lost period
i got my first period a week after i graduated eighth grade.
in comparison to my two best friends, i was late. but i was relieved.
i had always felt out of place when the 3 of us would make a trip to the bathroom to âclean upâ. unsure of what to do, i would awkwardly brush my hair and wait outside the stall, feeling left out and left behind.
so when it happened, i was over the moon. i felt like i had finally caught up. finally got it right.
only to get it wrong.
a few weeks passed and it didnât come back. i panicked to my mom, but she wasnât alarmed. she reassured me it would take some time to regulate. that i would need to be patient.
a few weeks more weeks passed. in hindsight, i can see that i was rapidly approaching the eerie beginnings of an eating disorder, though my intentions were innocent. my goal was to âslim downâ for high school in the fall. sounds harmless, right?
eventually my âdietâ turned into me religiously keeping track of every morsel that went into my body, and then religiously burning every morsel away. i was restricting and exercising twice a day. i was losing weight and getting smaller. my friends and family were commending my hard work. this is what society has taught us to do.
all of high school went by, and this âdietâ (read: eating disorder) became my life. toss in a few near death experiences, inpatient hospitalizations, attempts at weight restoration and subsequent relapses⊠you get the picture. for over four years i put my body through absolute hell. i deprived it. i burnt it out. it could barely support me breathing, walking.
it could never uphold a consistent, healthy mensural cycle.
a stable menstrual cycle is an indication of a happy and healthy body. i remember reading once that if you havenât gotten a period in 3 months, you should see a doctor. what did that mean for me, who, at that time, was YEARS beyond this warning. 3 months? try over 3 years.
when i finally committed to recovery, i had a lot on my plate (literally and figuratively). the absence of my period constantly lingered in the back of my mind. i knew i needed to fix it but had no idea where to begin. the doctors on my outpatient treatment team consistently promised that once i returned to and maintained a healthy weight and body fat percentage, my period would return.
i trusted them. i did what they said. to no avail.
in my years of initial recovery, i was luckily able to alleviate various physical and mental health problems that were triggered by my restrictive habits. but my period? that was stubborn.
eventually i realized i could no longer rely on a faint hope that âitâll come back soonâ
i needed to act.
this had gone on for far too long. my body needed me. one of my favorite quotes is ânothing changes if nothing changesâ. so i got to changing things.
i spent hours every night after a full day of college classes and homework, burying myself deeper and deeper in research. i joined forums, signed up for email subscriptions, read books. i was determined to naturally and lovingly call my cycle home. i had read plenty about the pill and decided it wasnât for me. my body didnât need a pill to mimic my cycle. my body needed MY CYCLE. and i was going to get it just that.
below are a few steps i took toward restoring my cycle.